OBJECT CLASS
keter
 
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SCP-001-J w/o Molly-guards
 
Item #: SCP-001-J
 
Object Class: Keter
 
Special Containment Procedures: The location of Site-00, where SCP-001-J is to be kept, must remain an absolute secret. To this end, Site-00 will be guarded entirely by automated defense systems and have no living staff whatsoever. SCP-001-J itself will be kept locked in a cube made entirely from tungsten carbide, which is itself inside of another cube made of tungsten carbide, which will in turn be placed at the bottom of a three-kilometer long elevator shaft. Multiple molly-guards have been carefully placed over SCP-001-J, and the robots on Site-00 will be prepared to replace these guards if needed.
 
Description: SCP-001-J is big, red, shiny, strangely appealing button that just begs to be pushed.
 
SCP-001-J is a self-destruct mechanism that Foundation scientists believe is powerful enough to destroy reality itself, consisting of a circular red button set into a metal case. It looks like candy.
 
The mechanism by which SCP-001-J operates is not fully understood but it would be awesome to find out.
 
SCP-001-J induces a mild psychic compulsion upon all beings who see it or hear it described to try to push it. You know you want to!
 
History: SCP-001-J was first discovered by President ██████████ of ███████████████ in ██/██/████, in an elevator car. At that time, SCP-001-J looked exactly as it does now, except for the addition of a sticky-note that said "If you push this button, you'll destroy everything." The President managed to fight his compulsion to press SCP-001-J long enough to remove SCP-001-J from the elevator and lock it in the closet of his office. Afterward, he contacted ██████████████████████████████, known to us as "The Founder," and charged him with creating a special organization with the specific goal of preventing SCP-001-J from being pressed, either by careless accident or by deliberate malice, and also with the goal of "protecting humanity from monsters and stuff." ██████████████████████████████ agreed, took SCP-001-J, and hid it under a pile of old socks in his basement. ██████████████████████████████ spent the remainder of his life sitting on his porch, using a shotgun to fend off miscreants on his lawn who were suspected of being SCP-001-J sympathizers. The millions of dollars he made on the stock exchange were used to create a trust fund that was the basis of our Foundation.
 
Since ██████████████████████████████ died and the Foundation was set up to replace him, there have been █████ attempts to press SCP-001-J. Before Site-00 was relocated to Antarctica-- [DATA EXPUNGED], there were many near-breaches of containment when Foundation personnel attempted to press SCP-001-J "to see what would happen" and had to be terminated. There have also been numerous attempts by the Foundation's enemies to retrieve SCP-001-J, particularly the Order of the Sacred Button-Pushers, who have sworn to stop at nothing to capture and press SCP-001-J.
 
Addendum 1: I, for one, think it absurd that we still know so little of this SCP, even though we owe the creation of our organization to it, and allow petty fears of existential annihilation to prevent us from studying SCP-001-J. I propose a simple test; using a remote-controlled drone, we will gently tap the outer surface of SCP-001-J. If my calculations are correct, only a tiny portion of everything will be destroyed, and the probability that we will be part of this portion is astronomically small. -Dr. Blarg
 
Addendum 2: Denied. Report to the psyche ward immediately. O5-█
 
Addendum 3: Recently, many instances of objects that superficially resemble SCP-001-J have appeared on the internet and elsewhere. Although they seem to share the memetic effects of SCP-001-J, reality-destroying properties have not been confirmed. Research into the possibility of using these devices as a preventative measure against people pushing SCP-001-J has been postponed due to the number of researchers who started pushing buttons and refused to stop.
 
Addendum 4: In relation to Addendum 3, researchers unable to stop pushing SCP-001-J lookalikes appear to have a chronic addiction, in that they are now physically reliant on pushing SCP-001-J lookalikes. The affected have been admitted to ████████████ Hospital in ███████, ███████, ██████ for foundation monitoring. Further research is recommendatory, but how it should be carried out will be the subject of further discussion.